The Journey

So we circle back to the Golden Rule: only you can identify if you are trans. Whether you identify as trans or not, I hope this guide has given you something to think about.

I will tell you that the journey varies. What one can see when they come out of the dark cave, if they were ever in a dark cave, is different for each person. For some, physically representing their true gender identity is easy. Others face a more difficult journey. Perhaps physically representing your true gender identity is like reaching a star on a distant mountain. It is achievable but it will take years. The journey could be perilous at times; there could be pitfalls and avalanches, blizzards and sweltering heat, but at the end the reward will be the happiness of being who you truly are and that makes it all worth it.

If there is one thing I can tell you: being on the journey is way better than being in the cave!

This guide has shown you the pitfalls and avalanches; things like the dysphoria trap, obstacles, and passing envy. Following it will not guarantee you succeed, but it will increase your chances on the journey. Sometimes you must supply something else in order to reach the summit: the belief that you can. It’s easy to get mired in negativity and start believing you won’t make it when the going gets hard.

So here are some things to do to help you when morale gets low:

Find community

Trying to take such a perilous journey alone is never a good idea. You need a like-minded group of supporters to vent to and hold your hand when the going gets rough. The great thing about the trans community is that it’s easy to find other people who are going through exactly what you’re going through, and it’s easy to make friends. If there is no local community around you, or you’d prefer an online community, there are some great communities out there.

Avoid negativity

Doomscrolling and people with negative attitudes can lead you to believe that you can’t make it, or worse, that the journey is not worth taking. Some people do have difficulty with “positivity” because it feels fake, but the truth is that no amount of negativity is going to change your gender identity and it is likely that such negativity will only increase your misery. Many of those who get embroiled in negative spaces eventually come to realize this and abandon those in favor of positive ones.

Go easy on yourself

The journey can be hard. So try not to put pressure on yourself to achieve a certain goal or be a certain way. Try to relax as much as you can and be patient for changes if they take a while - they will come.

Enjoy the road

Just like any scenic route, sometimes the journey has overlooks where you can take in breathtaking vistas. If you have a long trip, remember to hold tight all those little moments of peace or happiness you get as you become your true self. Celebrate every win no matter how small and try to recall them on the days where it’s hard to keep going.

Wishing you the best, no matter where life takes you!